When families break down

TO ALL YOU PEOPLE WHO TELL ME THAT I THINK I KNOW IT ALL. I DO IN THIS CASE:

I am an expert on this subject. In my own mind at least. Because families pray together does not mean they stay together. Some families that stayed together have caused absolute "mental death" to their children that will go on for generations. Some families that divorced should have stayed together.

I am the product of a broken home. My Mother had two husbands and therefore; two batches of children. When I think back to my childhood days I can compare real facts. Some children had parents that never divorced. These children, in the majority of cases, have also continued to remain married to their original spouse. So divorces begat divorces, I agree with that fact. But is "staying together..no matter what" a good philosophy? Not always.

I have had a chance to talk to some of these children of "both original parents" after the fact. In some cases they had good, positive, loving, religious childhoods. NOT MANY. JUST SOME.

I have gathered this info over several years from friends and relatives. I would see old childhood friends and say, "I remember when we were small, I was so jealous because you had a Daddy. You will not believe the horrific stories some of these people have told me. Boys and girls who were raped by their Daddy. Mothers who knew it was going on, but allowed it to happen and told the children to "Never tell anyone." They do tell after the parents die. They hate their parents by then but cannot forgive themselves for hating them because the Bible says, Honor your Father and Mother.

Others tell me about being cursed, beaten, (especially by Step-Parents), insulted, slapped etc. It infuriates me to think about it.

Some who I thought, lived in castles in the sky, suffered childhoods of Hell. One first cousin told me that his Dad would wake him out of sleep at night to beat him when he was a child. The worst that I have suffered from my parents, was watching them fuss and fight. In retrospect, my Mother started as many as my Daddy did, and was actually strong enough to win most of the fights. Maybe that is why he left. From that point on, I had a very good childhood because my brother, Jim Tolley, gave his childhood away for my sister, Gail, and me. He was seven years old at the time. He is the best influence I have ever had EVER in my entire life. He has never given me bad advice. He took a broken little, scared three year old girl and turned me into a person with self-esteem. (He missed his calling, he should have been a Psychiatrist or have an advice column in the paper. He would put Dear Abby to shame.) You bloggers may think I am mean as a snake, but I am a King snake. I am good for the people kingdom.

Back to the subject. In the majority of cases, you do not know who you are marrying. You know with whom you exchange vows but you do not know your future spouse. They may be even better than you thought they were. NOT! NEVER! WON'T HAPPEN! You may marry Dr. Jeckyll and Mr. Hyde will come home in his clothes one day. If so, get the HELL out. Don't use that sickening, over-used, excuse...."I stayed because of the kids." What did they do to deserve to be punished because you cannot admit you made a bad decision.

If you need advice, call me, I will call Jim and get back to you on it.

I am on my fourth husband, so I know what I am talking about. Given my life to do over, I would remarry three of the four...so trust me.

Are they cheating with men?
Those whore hoppers.